On Easter Sunday, after discovering our Easter baskets hidden across the main floor, we then continued my birthday celebration at the Nicolai house. I won’t officially turn 9 until April 16, but since that weekend will be filled with soccer matches in Madison, we decided to gather a week early.

I am always so grateful to have a family that slows down to mark every milestone with the traditional lighting of the candles.

My 9th birthday party was full of action… that is, Action City Family Fun Center and Trampoline Park!

My parents drove me and a few friends up to Eau Claire for a night of laser tag, bumper cars, go karts, arcade games, mini bowling, and trampoline fun and it was just what my soul needed. There, I was welcomed into my ninth year of life with pizza, sports cupcakes, nerf guns, and Dairy Queen Dilly bars.

I may not have beat the claw machine, but I definitely won at having some of the best buds a boy could ask for, and a super duper birthday celebration to show for it!

This is the face of a tough guy who fractured his pinky playing basketball. So tough, in fact, that I waited three days post-incident to visit the doctor. Now I have to wear this finger splint for 6-8 weeks to help it heal. I’m super bummed that this will greatly inhibit my ability to unload the dishwasher.

Mom and Dad didn’t want to attend any more meetings with my principal, so Genesee and I got left behind on our annual family trip to Mexico. It was their first childless, overnight trip together since they welcomed me into the world 9 years ago, and even though they sent us happy pictures to keep in touch, I know there was true heartbreak on the other side of those smiles.

I, on the other hand, didn’t miss them one bit. I only sobbed during every FaceTime call to make them think I couldn’t live without them.

But really, Genesee and I were so busy being spoiled by Grandma and Grandpa that there was no time to think about how much I didn’t miss them. Still, I felt obligated to send multiple texts every hour to ensure them that I wasn’t depressed at all and was, in fact, overjoyed to experience new adventures instead, like separation anxiety.

Despite my feelings of abandonment, I was deeply concerned that my parents weren’t going to have any fun without us…. no extra butts to wipe, no waiting to eat until they cut our food, no breaking up our sibling bickerings… I mean, they probably didn’t even leave their room.

Of course, I truly wanted them to enjoy their first and last trip without us, so I took it upon myself to distract my parents from their boredom by getting homesick in the toilet and telling them every unnecessary detail. This was also the moment that I allowed Grandma to co-sleep with me, just to further exaggerate the pretend struggle it was to not be in my parents’ custody. I even asked mom and dad if they could catch an earlier flight home, to make them believe I was desperate to see them again.

Luckily, it was a short 5 day and 400 nights trip, and suddenly my parents were back in the Minneapolis airport, exactly when my precise “when-will-you-be-home” tracking device indicated.

It was no big deal to be reunited, but I did hug my parents extra tight and begged them to never leave us in such capable hands again, for their sake, of course. Because no child enjoys seeing their parents experience such a miserable and peaceful adults-only tropical vacation. Surely, they will think twice before traumatizing uninviting us next time. Or perhaps the babysitters might reconsider watching us in the future, given my performance.

Seriously though, thanks Grandma and Grandpa for keeping us safe, entertained, well fed, and well loved while our parents left the country.

It’s a winter-ful life, but we can no longer freeze the day because it is time for spring!

Ever since I made friends with that magician on the cruise ship, I’ve been really intrigued by magic. So, when mom saw a magic show coming to town, we booked our tickets and headed to The Pump House!

When the magician asked for a volunteer at the top of his show, Genesee and I waved our arms erratically enough to bring attention to our row, which put mom in a vulnerable position to get voluntold to go up on stage, where the magician performed a lie detector trick on mom. Unfortunately, we forgot to document this main event, but we all learned the truth of the matter: Mom is a good liar.

The extra magic part was that our whole entire family found ourselves up on stage at some point during the show and it was a blast! Because who doesn’t want to be the chosen one? (Answer: Mom. Mom doesn’t like to be the chosen one, but her stage fright appearance made for a good chuckle.)

Look who started dance lessons this month?! Genesee expressed interest in learning, so mom enrolled her in a 4-week introductory class at the Lunda Community Center.

Guess what part of dance lessons she likes best?

… the part where dance class ends and she gets to swim at Lunda’s water park.

I just wanted to leave this here: we are the champions.

Sure, our first opponent ended up forfeiting the game since they showed up late, and yes the second game was a close call, but we dominated the final (championship) game. And that’s how we ended the season: in first place.

But I’m not here to brag or anything. Because not every team can have an almost-undefeated season. Mel-Min just happened to have the talent to claim “winner, winner chicken dinner.” But just because our team is better than yours, I would never rub it in your face. So, besides being practically unbeatable and crowned the best team in the Coulee Region, I have chosen to remain humble… while I perform the Griddy dance all the way out of the gymnasium.

Before leaving Florida to return to the not-sunshine state of Wisconsin, which has no palm trees or cruise ships, we maximized our remaining time with family by touring the Kennedy Space Center, hiking the nature preserves, participating in escape room challenges, visiting science and art museums, and eating Gainesville’s best pizza and vegan ice cream.

Clearly, this trip will go down in history as my favorite adventure yet!

But also recorded in the books, unfortunately, is my student status as truant.

Of course, my rule-following soul was initially stressed about that scary attendance notification mailed to our house on official school district letterhead and the mandatory principal meeting that followed, but in the end, the crime was totally worth the time because family is everything, and, now that I’ve successfully completed my maiden voyage on a cruise ship, no school policy is gonna hold me back from living my best life.

The only reason I allowed the wedding night to conclude was because I knew we would get to crash the honeymoon the next morning…. ON A CARNIVAL CRUISE SHIP!

In honor of the newlyweds, we set sail with 21 friends and family members to continue the celebration across 6 more days, in the middle of the ocean, with stops in the Dominican Republic and Turks and Caicos.

There are no words to describe such an adventure… I could tell you about the bottomless kiddie cocktails, the late night pizza, the all-you-can-eat buffets, and the self-serve ice cream stations, but it’s not the same as having your taste buds actually tingle. Or I could try to explain that morning when we found towel animals in every corner of the ship and that afternoon when we witnessed an angelfish carved from a block of ice, but to be truly wowed, you had to see it in person. And, I suppose there’s also no point in listing off all my favorite floating amenities like the hot tubs, waterslides, miniature golf course, and the basketball court, because that would sound a little bit like bragging. Plus, no one would believe that we had our own personal magician who removed dad’s Apple watch right in front of our eyes and gave me the strength to bend coins.

As it turns out, some experiences are simply beyond words, and can only attempt to be told through 117 pictures: