Mom and Dad didn’t want to attend any more meetings with my principal, so Genesee and I got left behind on our annual family trip to Mexico. It was their first childless, overnight trip together since they welcomed me into the world 9 years ago, and even though they sent us happy pictures to keep in touch, I know there was true heartbreak on the other side of those smiles.

I, on the other hand, didn’t miss them one bit. I only sobbed during every FaceTime call to make them think I couldn’t live without them.

But really, Genesee and I were so busy being spoiled by Grandma and Grandpa that there was no time to think about how much I didn’t miss them. Still, I felt obligated to send multiple texts every hour to ensure them that I wasn’t depressed at all and was, in fact, overjoyed to experience new adventures instead, like separation anxiety.

Despite my feelings of abandonment, I was deeply concerned that my parents weren’t going to have any fun without us…. no extra butts to wipe, no waiting to eat until they cut our food, no breaking up our sibling bickerings… I mean, they probably didn’t even leave their room.

Of course, I truly wanted them to enjoy their first and last trip without us, so I took it upon myself to distract my parents from their boredom by getting homesick in the toilet and telling them every unnecessary detail. This was also the moment that I allowed Grandma to co-sleep with me, just to further exaggerate the pretend struggle it was to not be in my parents’ custody. I even asked mom and dad if they could catch an earlier flight home, to make them believe I was desperate to see them again.

Luckily, it was a short 5 day and 400 nights trip, and suddenly my parents were back in the Minneapolis airport, exactly when my precise “when-will-you-be-home” tracking device indicated.

It was no big deal to be reunited, but I did hug my parents extra tight and begged them to never leave us in such capable hands again, for their sake, of course. Because no child enjoys seeing their parents experience such a miserable and peaceful adults-only tropical vacation. Surely, they will think twice before traumatizing uninviting us next time. Or perhaps the babysitters might reconsider watching us in the future, given my performance.

Seriously though, thanks Grandma and Grandpa for keeping us safe, entertained, well fed, and well loved while our parents left the country.

It’s a winter-ful life, but we can no longer freeze the day because it is time for spring!

Ever since I made friends with that magician on the cruise ship, I’ve been really intrigued by magic. So, when mom saw a magic show coming to town, we booked our tickets and headed to The Pump House!

When the magician asked for a volunteer at the top of his show, Genesee and I waved our arms erratically enough to bring attention to our row, which put mom in a vulnerable position to get voluntold to go up on stage, where the magician performed a lie detector trick on mom. Unfortunately, we forgot to document this main event, but we all learned the truth of the matter: Mom is a good liar.

The extra magic part was that our whole entire family found ourselves up on stage at some point during the show and it was a blast! Because who doesn’t want to be the chosen one? (Answer: Mom. Mom doesn’t like to be the chosen one, but her stage fright appearance made for a good chuckle.)

Look who started dance lessons this month?! Genesee expressed interest in learning, so mom enrolled her in a 4-week introductory class at the Lunda Community Center.

Guess what part of dance lessons she likes best?

… the part where dance class ends and she gets to swim at Lunda’s water park.