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He moves like Jaeger

Taking on the world and becoming me: Chronicles, confessions & milestones of a little peanut

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Jaeger Amarihttps://hemoveslikejaeger.wordpress.comHi! My name is Jaeger Amari Goodenough and I’m new to this world as of April 16, 2014. My mom helped me create this blog so my loved ones near and far can follow me on my journey of self-discovery. I also hope to look back on this one day to see all the moments that have shaped me.
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We Are the Champions

February 18, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

I just wanted to leave this here: we are the champions.

Sure, our first opponent ended up forfeiting the game since they showed up late, and yes the second game was a close call, but we dominated the final (championship) game. And that’s how we ended the season: in first place.

But I’m not here to brag or anything. Because not every team can have an almost-undefeated season. Mel-Min just happened to have the talent to claim “winner, winner chicken dinner.” But just because our team is better than yours, I would never rub it in your face. So, besides being practically unbeatable and crowned the best team in the Coulee Region, I have chosen to remain humble… while I perform the Griddy dance all the way out of the gymnasium.

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The After Party

February 12, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

Before leaving Florida to return to the not-sunshine state of Wisconsin, which has no palm trees or cruise ships, we maximized our remaining time with family by touring the Kennedy Space Center, hiking the nature preserves, participating in escape room challenges, visiting science and art museums, and eating Gainesville’s best pizza and vegan ice cream.

Clearly, this trip will go down in history as my favorite adventure yet!

But also recorded in the books, unfortunately, is my student status as truant.

Of course, my rule-following soul was initially stressed about that scary attendance notification mailed to our house on official school district letterhead and the mandatory principal meeting that followed, but in the end, the crime was totally worth the time because family is everything, and, now that I’ve successfully completed my maiden voyage on a cruise ship, no school policy is gonna hold me back from living my best life.

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Crashing the Honeymoon

February 9, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

The only reason I allowed the wedding night to conclude was because I knew we would get to crash the honeymoon the next morning…. ON A CARNIVAL CRUISE SHIP!

In honor of the newlyweds, we set sail with 21 friends and family members to continue the celebration across 6 more days, in the middle of the ocean, with stops in the Dominican Republic and Turks and Caicos.

There are no words to describe such an adventure… I could tell you about the bottomless kiddie cocktails, the late night pizza, the all-you-can-eat buffets, and the self-serve ice cream stations, but it’s not the same as having your taste buds actually tingle. Or I could try to explain that morning when we found towel animals in every corner of the ship and that afternoon when we witnessed an angelfish carved from a block of ice, but to be truly wowed, you had to see it in person. And, I suppose there’s also no point in listing off all my favorite floating amenities like the hot tubs, waterslides, miniature golf course, and the basketball court, because that would sound a little bit like bragging. Plus, no one would believe that we had our own personal magician who removed dad’s Apple watch right in front of our eyes and gave me the strength to bend coins.

As it turns out, some experiences are simply beyond words, and can only attempt to be told through 117 pictures:

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Sh*ts About to Go Down

February 3, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

In January, we headed to the Sunshine state, and we didn’t return until February!

But it wasn’t all fun and games at first, because we had lots of work to do, in preparation for the big event.

Well, some of us worked hard, heat pressing t-shirts for the wedding party, designing wedding favors for esteemed guests, dog sitting furry companions, keeping the streets of Gainesville safe, filling candy vending machines, and keeping the bride and groom caffeinated, while dad just took joyrides on the John Deere tractor. But still, it was a team effort. And eventually, after all the blood, sweat, tears, and child labor, it was finally time to experience what we flew across the country for and had been anticipating since Covid ruined the original 2020 plans: the CandE Factory wedding extravaganza!

And Chelsee and Ernest did not disappoint. It was like a circus meets county fair meets community event meets wedding nuptials meets every-kids-dream-come-true. Between the stilt walker, trapeze artists, hot chocolate bar, snow cone food truck, fake snow storm, magician, game show, hypnotist, caricature artist, calypso band, face painting, and so much more, we had the time of our lives!

Then, long after the sun set and all attendees were drunk from fun, the wedding party clumsily executed our flash mob assignment, and mom pronounced the happy (exhausted) couple officially plunged around 10 p.m.

It was magical. It was exhilarating. It was epic.

They were not lying when they said sh*t was about to go down. (View the video highlight reel below.) And not only do my sister and I have a new uncle to show for it, we also now have high, unrealistic expectations for all future weddings we attend.

Congrats C & E!

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Gone (Ice) Fishing

January 29, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

One of my favorite parts of winter is chillin’ with Grandpa and Dad… literally.

That’s right… ever since last year’s adventure with the sport, dad got me hooked on ice fishing.

This year, we fished even smarter: First, we invested in a 4-wheeler with the proper registration tags so we didn’t end up on the DNR’s’ Most Wanted List. Then, we implemented new safety measures to avoid dropping our phones into the ice holes (after learning about Dad’s friend who lost three phones to the ice fishing underworld). Finally, we decided to upgrade our ice shanty to take some of the ice out of fishing.

Ice fishing is so cool! And yet, so warm.

I just love getting pulled on the sled, practicing my ice skating skills, and of course, I live for those visits to Kwik Trip after such a hard day of work. Oh, and the fishing! I like that part, too.

So, if you’re looking for me this winter, catch me on the frozen lakes because I’m probably gone fishing.

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Shameless Plug

January 15, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

In case you didn’t know, my sister now offers professional dog snuggling services. As you’ll see demonstrated below with our canine model, Ginger, Genesee provides several different hugging techniques, which are sure to leave your furry companion feeling smothered with love. Snuggles can take place on wood floors, carpet, or even on public sidewalks if Genesee happens to meet you while you’re walking your dog. In fact, if you’re not sure if you own a dog, let Genesee into your life and she’ll likely find it; she can spot a dog from miles away, even with her eyes closed. I mean, this girl LOVES dogs. Let her love yours today!

*No animals were harmed in the testing of these services.

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Artist in Residency

January 14, 2023 by Jaeger Amari

You know 2023 is off to a good start when you get to host an out-of-state artist in residency for a week (a.k.a. my aunt Cha Cha). We eagerly planned for Chelsee’s arrival so that we could be her personal welcoming committee at the airport, and sure enough, we saw her plane descent from the clouds just as we approached the French Island exit ramp!

Of course, this was strictly a work trip, but Genesee and I were determined to sneak in some cooking, sledding, and board game shenanigans with Cha Cha. We also invited her to pick us up from school one day to see our lockers, classrooms, and Mel-Min’s revered pet therapy dog, and then I requested her presence at my indoor soccer match so I could have a superfan! But after that, it was down to business for Cha Cha because she had to kick off an Arts and Healing program at a local middle school.

It’s no surprise that Cha Cha worked wonders in that art room, and I was also not shocked that all the kids loved her, but just to be clear, she’s OUR aunt and while sharing is caring, giving her back to us is a non-negotiable.

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NYE 2022

December 31, 2022 by Jaeger Amari

Nothing rings in the new year like chicken soft shell tacos and charades with Grandma and Grandpa, coloring contests with kiddie cocktails, and opening UPS-delivered post-Christmas gifts.

Looking back, 2022 was a good year. But all good things must come to an end. And so, that’s a wrap.

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Christmas 2022

December 26, 2022 by Jaeger Amari

It was a grueling 364-day wait, (made slightly more bearable by the snow day that cancelled school on the eve of winter break), but somehow we made it to Christmas! For months and months, Genesee and I have been the hype crew, spreading anticipatory cheer like only a 5 and 8-year-old can, counting down the days until the most wonderful time of the year.

As tradition would have it, we made Christmas cookies with Grandma, participated in the meatball assembly line with Dad, enjoyed Grandpa’s signature Grasshopper shakes, and left out cookies for our main man, Santa.

It was the Christmas of Robux gift cards, Prime hydration drinks, Milwaukee Bucks paraphernalia, Apple watches and TVs, winter storm/blizzard warnings, hot chocolate mornings, and fireplace crackles all night.

It was Christmas, finally. And then it was December 26th.

And so the countdown begins again.

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Fresh Haircut

December 23, 2022 by Jaeger Amari

This is what a superfan looks like.

#Giannis #Antetokounmpo #34

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